Tuesday 18 June 2013

Rains & Romance!!! In Mumbai!!! Please!!!!

               I still remember the unusual heavy downpour I had first witnessed during my stay in California. A local friend of mine had then said, “It doesn’t rain this much often.” I replied, “ I am glad. I hate rains!” She was shocked. She said, “If I am not wrong, the place where you come from, it rains heavily for 4 months in a year.” I replied, ”Yes. And that is why I hate it!” The conversation ended. It was the USA. People normally do not make personal remarks there about your likes or Dislikes. Had the same conversation happened in India, chances are that it would have continued further, with the lady saying, “ Oh my God, that’s so boring..or so unromantic..or blah blah blah”. And it always makes me wonder, really, is the love for rains all it takes to label one as a Romantic?

          It is not actually our fault. This is what we took from Bollywood. Though I am sure, even Bollywood, behind the amiable facade of splashing gallons of water with a pump(s) across the shooting set and calling it “rains”, just to lend credibility to the script, did not mean to showcase it as romantic. If any, the feeling associated with rains is plumb Lust. With the lady shown all drenched and seductive, Bollywood did not intend to show romance. Even the famous Raj Kapoor song, “Pyaar hua, Ikraar Hua...” (Love has already happened, then why are you scared of Love?) that started the trend of singing and dancing in rains actually meant lust. “” What he meant with love in the next stanza was actually understood few years later by a Condom manufacturing company. I hope you guys remember that advert or the song , “EK ladki bheegi bhaagi si...” Come-on! Let’s admit! If an unknown guy starts singing like that when the girl is alone at night, it's rankling and not romantic. From then, till now, Bollywood has again and again shown the feeling of lust in rains, and we think it's romantic.

                Now let’s forget Bollywood, and talk real life. Forget enjoying the rains from the window of your home, eating the famous pakodas and drinking tea. Let’s be practical! It transpiring, right from the first rains, the city’s infrastructure, unreservedly worsens. Water-logging is the most common view from any window. So, unless you find swimming or walking in muddy (read dirty) water “romantic”, there is nothing remotely related to romance in it. And if you are the common man of Mumbai, who takes the public transport to work, then unless you find getting wet by the water dripping from other umbrellas or raincoats romantic, I rest my case. Even if you wanna relate getting wet with water, somehow with taking shower together (thinking way too much) , it still will be associated with lust.

               For the elite, who do not go through this trauma and travel in cars, seemingly finding long drives very romantic,please explain how is traveling at the speed of 10 miles an hour with continuous honking romantic? Or driving over the potholes muttering imprecations or on roads that the civic authority decides to repair as soon as the monsoon commences, anything to do with romance? I know it feels good to have a nice lovely lady in your arms/ or held by a guy (for girls) under one umbrella, walking in the rains. But do you seriously need water poured over you to be romantic? Believe it or not, you walk hand-in-hand with your partner on the road and people will continue to stare; rains or no rains. So please do not use “rains” as an excuse to do it. You like it, go ahead. Do it even when there is bright sunshine. A small token of affection like giving a chocolate for no reason, is also romantic. You don’t need rains for that. Ok, I am flying off at a tangent. Let's not focus on what’s romantic but on rains.

               The best part is when most Facebook updates (especially females) start going, “Oo I love rains it’s so romantic”,”I am in love with rains”. All I want to say is, yes, it looks wonderful if I have to watch it through a window. But if I have to travel in it through the conditions mentioned above, it’s a curse. So please do not bog down to the pressure from the world to be labeled a romantic only if you love rains. Feel free to cuss it and I am sure your FB status will still get equal number of ‘Likes’. You see Ladies, people do not actually ‘Like’ your status, they just want to be good to you. Ok wait! I have a full post about Facebook 'Likes' and how it works. Please read it! ;-)

                I am sure you can think of more trouble caused by the pestilential rains in Mumbai and how it’s not as romantic as proclaimed. My job was to break the stereotype and make you wear the thinking hat on this topic ;-) . So just like X-Men said “Mutant and proud”, please join me in saying “Hate rains and Proud”.

PS: I do know the importance of rainfall. My argument is just over its linking with romance.

Cheers!