Types of 'Drunk'

            Being a non alcoholic bachelor in your mid twenties has its pros and cons. One of the pros is that you get invited to a lot of parties where alcohol flows and since you are a non alcoholic, you tend to remember the most that happened last night. There is also a sinister feeling attached since you are the one who is having the most fun at other's expense. Having being traveled around the world, I have believed in the world known fact that no matter which part of the world you belong, you always tend to drink in excess when the booze is free. I have so far distinguished people on the types of 'drunk' based on their behavior after they get high.

            The first one being the most common one called the 'sentimental' type. These types of people get emotional every time they get drunk. They cry, love, hate and show all kinds of emotions. They are the ones who most often are the 'shayars' of the group or the love smitten ones. Though this is a broad category but I reserve it for those who are only in this category and show no other symptoms of the other type of drunks. It is better to not cross their emotions or engage them in a discussion when they are drunk because even if they do not have the tendency to be violent, they are often the brawl starters.

           Then we have the type which probably is common only in India. They are the 'English speaking' drunk. These people are the ones who start talking in English as soon as they are high. Rather this is a sign to know if they are drunk or no. Repetitive use of a single word or sentence is their most common phenomenon. They are fun when they get going. Right on the other end of spectrum, and I say this on the risk of hurting a few people I admire, are the ones I call 'Silent' types. They are the most boring ones because they just switch on the mute mode as soon as they are drunk. In case you hold a grudge, this is the time to tell them what you have always feared cause there will be no retaliation.

             We also have the 'all out' types of drunk. They are the ones who have the tendency to drink to an extent beyond control and they lose their sense of prevail. They have the tendency to be either the most fun person cause they have no clue what they are up to but also at the same time the most difficult ones for people in control. I kind of hate these types cause one or 2 people from the party have to curtail their fun to take care of these types. They are also the most stupid ones cause from what I know they suffer the most horrid hangover the next day.

           On the same lines at the other end of spectrum, we have a type called as 'tanker'. These are the ones who are always in control no matter how much they drink. They are my personal favorites. They are the ones who have the most fun or rather are the cause of fun for most people in the party and at the same time have the capacity to switch straight into the 'savior' mode. If anything goes wrong or anyone needs help, they are the ones that are on the front or help the most and even more than the non alcoholic ones. It is often advisable to not compete with them when you are on a drinking binge. It is always best to have a couple of such people in the group.

          Off late I also discovered a new type which I term as the 'irritating' types. They tend to switch on the 'irritate everybody' mode as soon as they are drunk. They often feel they are the wisecrack ass of the party but more often than nor they are just the crack ass.It is better to stay away from them if you want to enjoy the party to the max and be around the 'sentimental' or 'tanker' types.

          These are the most common types and the drunk can vary type to type on occasions but still can be based in a group on the symptoms they show the most. Again these types are made from a non alcoholic perspective. This post is a humorous attempt and I have no intention of hurting anyone. The declaration in the previous statement is very important cause without it I may face the risk of not being invited into the next party. Till then, Enjoy and do add if you feel there are more types I have missed ,in the comments section.

Cheers!